I've been thinking a lot lately about the mantra that my old Science of Mind Practitioner would use when counseling...well, just about everybody. She would say nonchalantly but emphatically, "Not a word of truth in it, not a word of truth in it." Most of us would find that so hard to take. It was very disconcerting, especially if we were full into a story that was making us miserable. How could she be so heartless? Her tempering words, however, had a profound way of bringing us back to the truth, which remained, you are so much greater than the story you are now characterizing yourself by.
Not only do we tend to frame and characterize ourselves by these stories of our lives, we tend to keep ourselves stuck in a place that no longer serves our needs or desires by continually recounting them. It's time to let go of the stories that we keep telling - over and over again. Some are funny, poignant, disturbing, even salacious. Don't we love those! - We of the MTV, VH1, TMZ, reality generation. We love the titillating stories that spread virally faster than the newest disease on the block. The old newspaper mantra was, "If it bleeds, it leads." And it's never been more true in our exploitation of life that we've come to know as "Reality TV." In fact, nothing is further from reality than these shows that are edited to create the most surreal moments one can imagine. They are edited to foster division, jealousy, and hatred. They are as untrue as the disturbing stories we tell about our lives.
It's time to let go. I mean, really let go. We need to stop telling the stories that we think define our lives. Our words are so powerful, they create the container within which we create our lives. I think of Ernest Holmes insightful words when he said, "We create with monotonous regularity the patterns of our past." But we don't have to. Our past does not have to equal our future unless we let it. We must stop with the "yes, but..." argument and then launch into another story that gives evidence to this faulty thinking. We must let go, with a vengeance, in order to the live the lives we are dreaming of. In the words of the immensely talented and intuitive astrologer, Maria De Simone, "Get a grip, but first you'll need to let go!"
We are creatures of habit, there's no denying that. We tend to get into a rut or habit of thinking that we are not even aware of and yet it is guiding our lives. It's much like the tail wagging the dog. But the moment our awareness kicks in, when we shine a flashlight on our thinking, we will become blatantly aware of it. Marianne Williamson, used to say, and I'm paraphrasing here, that the moment we become conscious of a habit or a thought, we have changed it simply by virtue of our attention to it - it simply cannot be the same - ever. In other words our attention to something has already begun the process for healing or change.
Begin to notice the stories that you tell; stories about yourself and about others. You'll notice that we are attracted to re-telling disturbing incidents. Consider something that happens that really pisses you off - the jerk in traffic, your big mouth friend, a boss that will never understand what you do, or the roommate that drank the bottle of champagne that you were saving for a special occasion, only to throw it up on your new Flokati rug. You might tell and re-tell those stories for a week or more. If it has a good or funny twist to it, it might make the rotation of your top ten stories that you love to tell. Now consider how many times you will talk about the flowers that your husband gave you for your birthday - a week in advance! Just to commemorate the beginning of your birthday week! (Thank you, sweetheart. They are beautiful!) Why don't those stories have staying power? They are nice moments in our lives but more often then not, they fade into the background.
It's time to start mining the positive things that happen to us for all they're worth. Begin to collect stories of all the positive things that happen to you - remember what you focus on expands. Keep a journal of wonderful memories in your life - go back as far as you can remember. A surprise birthday party when you were 16 will not only be a treasured moment to look back on, but will also be the catalyst for future times of surprise and joy for you. Begin a gratitude list, of things that are happening right in your life. Appreciation is a powerful force for creation. Begin to move your thoughts in the direction of where you want your life to go.
I find comfort in heeding the words of a learned Buddhist and scholar, Daisaku Ikeda when he says, "There may be times when life seems gloomy and dull. When we feel stuck in some situation or other, when we are negative toward everything, when we feel lost and bewildered, not sure which way to turn - at such times we must transform our passive mind-set and determine, 'I will proceed along this path, I will pursue my mission today.' When we do so a genuine springtime arrives in our heart and flowers start to blossom."
Small changes will pay off in big ways. Don't think that you have to aim for perfection in order for things to change. Just put a wrench in your patterns and habits that keep you stuck. Baby steps have a way of accumulating and amassing momentum for change. Just change one thing this week. Catch a thought mid-stream and decide you are not going to let it disturb you any more. Realize how feeble it is on its own. Realize that on it's own merit, it falls apart. For example, a fear thought crossed my mind the other day about my career and I caught it. I ran it through my head again and knew that it was a lie. I replaced it with a strong affirmation that poured out of the center of my being. As quickly as that, I banished a thought that had taken up residency in my mind for years. Imagine my relief. Now that thought has no hold on me anymore. It is not directing my actions. I have changed it forever. Immediately I saw the effect in my life, in subtle and not so subtle ways.
Here are a few more things you can do:
- Check out The Work, Byron Katie's powerful method of questioning your thoughts.
- Begin reciting the ABC's of powerfully charged words, advocated by the teaching of Abraham - A, appreciation; B, bliss; C, clarity and so on. Go all the way through the alphabet to Z and you'll see how this simple exercise will set you on a different course for your day.
- Check out Louise Hay's website where she offers a world of affirmations, books and CD's that will rock your world.
We are so much more powerful than the stories and thoughts we allow to define our lives. Simple exercises that interrupt our habitual mind chatter are powerful tools and they will change your life. You will begin to more easily let the things in that you want and it will begin an avalanche of change. You have begun to steer your life in the direction of your dreams.
This week, notice your words, notice your stories and make a conscious effort to let them go. In the wise words of Louise Hay, "What you think and what you believe will come true for you. Your thoughts create your life; it's that simple, and when we get that, we can make enormous changes."
I leave you with an inspiring video that my wonderful friend, Rachel forwarded to me. You will see how the man in this video has learned to defy his limitations and believe differently about them and his life. He personifies the words, "Not a word of truth in it."
Monday, July 19, 2010
Sunday, May 23, 2010
Self Love 2.0
I've been thinking a lot lately about something Elizabeth Gilbert, author of Eat, Pray, Love said, "Life begins the day you drop the knife that you are holding to your own neck."
With so many options and examples in the world today of who we think we should be and how we should act, we sometimes find ourselves in a swirl of uncertainty that leaves us far from resembling the person we were born to be. Media, in all its splendor, brings us examples of people living extraordinary lives and doing extraordinary things and in comparison we feel relatively insignificant. It's that "Aha" moment that would mortify Oprah when we judge ourselves lacking in comparison to others. When we "compare and despair." Anne Lamott, author and speaker, calls it "psychic Spanx." We squeeze ourselves into these molds that keep us smaller and more contained in our attempt to people please and gain affection, happiness, power and everything we deem important in this life. We tend to lose ourselves for those things that we want. It's faulty problem solving, at best.
It's time to shed the Spanx like our grandmother's did their girdles and realize how precious and amazing we are. We must silence that critical voice in our heads, or at least send it to it's room for more extended periods of time. We tend to look at our circumstances and the lessons that we are going through and judge them, or ourselves harshly. We forget that it is those circumstances that help us become more of who we are. They help us uncover our divinity and bring more love and happiness to our lives, which in turn allows us to bestow to others.
It's time to stop berating ourselves so harshly. The self criticism must be replaced with self forgiveness. We must begin to understand and accept the perfection of the things that we are going through and know that each and every day we are doing our best. Each challenge that we encounter helps us reveal more of our own divinity. And right there in the center of your spiritual identity is you. In all your quirky idiosyncrasies there is no one like you. You were born uniquely qualified to bring your gift into this world. No one can take your place.
We must begin to honor ourselves as much as we would a best friend, or a lover, or the ones we idolize who we think are doing so much better than we are. When my best friend is going through a difficult time I suggest that he look at himself through my eyes for the truth. Or as Ann Lamott so succinctly puts it, "The self that is reflected in the love of your very best friends' eyes."
We are given opportunities to shed the skins that cover our true divinity every day. Or as the Buddhists say, opportunities to polish the diamond of our own enlightenment. But what does that mean? It means we get to look at our anger or resentments that we hold. We get to look at our beliefs, those thoughts that we keep on thinking, that no longer serve us. Thoughts that we hold as true but don't examine where they came from. We get to look at that anger that might reveal itself as an addiction or compulsive dieting or binging or shopping, smoking, drugs or the bitter mind chatter that has us arguing for our limitations.
They come up in our reality so we can see that they are no longer needed for our protection. They come to pass, not to stay. Or as my friend Jacob would say, "When you are going through hell, KEEP GOING - do not sit down and languish in the misery of it all." Do not stay and criticize and demean yourself. Drop the knife that you are holding to your own neck and realize that these circumstances have come into your life to help you become more of your magnificent self. It's time to turn the love hose back onto ourselves. It's the only way we can extend it to others. A starving man can never offer food to another. It's the only thing that will bring peace - peace to our own hearts and peace to a world that is too harshly extending its own judgment outwardly.
We hold all the power in our hands and hearts. Dare to think differently when a self loathing thought crosses your mind. You are standing up in the midst of a storm with all the courage you can muster, in order to reveal your divinity. It is brave and noble stance and it is worth your self approval. Love yourself where you are right now.
I leave you with a quote from Henry Miller who said, "If we have not found heaven within, it is a certainty we will not find it without."
With so many options and examples in the world today of who we think we should be and how we should act, we sometimes find ourselves in a swirl of uncertainty that leaves us far from resembling the person we were born to be. Media, in all its splendor, brings us examples of people living extraordinary lives and doing extraordinary things and in comparison we feel relatively insignificant. It's that "Aha" moment that would mortify Oprah when we judge ourselves lacking in comparison to others. When we "compare and despair." Anne Lamott, author and speaker, calls it "psychic Spanx." We squeeze ourselves into these molds that keep us smaller and more contained in our attempt to people please and gain affection, happiness, power and everything we deem important in this life. We tend to lose ourselves for those things that we want. It's faulty problem solving, at best.
It's time to shed the Spanx like our grandmother's did their girdles and realize how precious and amazing we are. We must silence that critical voice in our heads, or at least send it to it's room for more extended periods of time. We tend to look at our circumstances and the lessons that we are going through and judge them, or ourselves harshly. We forget that it is those circumstances that help us become more of who we are. They help us uncover our divinity and bring more love and happiness to our lives, which in turn allows us to bestow to others.
It's time to stop berating ourselves so harshly. The self criticism must be replaced with self forgiveness. We must begin to understand and accept the perfection of the things that we are going through and know that each and every day we are doing our best. Each challenge that we encounter helps us reveal more of our own divinity. And right there in the center of your spiritual identity is you. In all your quirky idiosyncrasies there is no one like you. You were born uniquely qualified to bring your gift into this world. No one can take your place.
We must begin to honor ourselves as much as we would a best friend, or a lover, or the ones we idolize who we think are doing so much better than we are. When my best friend is going through a difficult time I suggest that he look at himself through my eyes for the truth. Or as Ann Lamott so succinctly puts it, "The self that is reflected in the love of your very best friends' eyes."
We are given opportunities to shed the skins that cover our true divinity every day. Or as the Buddhists say, opportunities to polish the diamond of our own enlightenment. But what does that mean? It means we get to look at our anger or resentments that we hold. We get to look at our beliefs, those thoughts that we keep on thinking, that no longer serve us. Thoughts that we hold as true but don't examine where they came from. We get to look at that anger that might reveal itself as an addiction or compulsive dieting or binging or shopping, smoking, drugs or the bitter mind chatter that has us arguing for our limitations.
They come up in our reality so we can see that they are no longer needed for our protection. They come to pass, not to stay. Or as my friend Jacob would say, "When you are going through hell, KEEP GOING - do not sit down and languish in the misery of it all." Do not stay and criticize and demean yourself. Drop the knife that you are holding to your own neck and realize that these circumstances have come into your life to help you become more of your magnificent self. It's time to turn the love hose back onto ourselves. It's the only way we can extend it to others. A starving man can never offer food to another. It's the only thing that will bring peace - peace to our own hearts and peace to a world that is too harshly extending its own judgment outwardly.
We hold all the power in our hands and hearts. Dare to think differently when a self loathing thought crosses your mind. You are standing up in the midst of a storm with all the courage you can muster, in order to reveal your divinity. It is brave and noble stance and it is worth your self approval. Love yourself where you are right now.
I leave you with a quote from Henry Miller who said, "If we have not found heaven within, it is a certainty we will not find it without."
Tuesday, April 13, 2010
Oh, Brother!
I've been thinking a lot lately about something A Course In Miracles says, "Charity is a way of looking at another as if he had already gone far beyond his actual accomplishments in time." Wouldn't that be great if we actually did that? We all know that forgiveness is something that we do for ourselves in order to release the pain that is holding us back - it never has anything to do with the other person. You know that old adage about how holding on to anger and resentment is like "taking poison and waiting for the other person to die." But when we perceive another as if he's already accomplished his desires, that is a powerful act and a substantial contribution to another person.
When Jesus healed someone, it was because he saw that person as perfect. He held the perfection of the person in his consciousness. He did not see the disease, the problem or lack. In his presence, they were whole and then they would become that. This is why so many spiritual teachers do not want to hear our stories. They don't want to be dragged into our dysfunction or dis-ease. It is not the truth of who we are.
I was fortunate to know Ernest Holmes' Practitioner, Vetura Papke. She was my teacher and my Practitioner. The first time I made an appointment to see Vetura for spiritual guidance, she sat behind a desk in all her 80-some years of glory. She was as sweet looking as the kindest grandmother and she always smelled like flowers. As I began to lay out my woes, I noticed that she was mumbling something. I continued telling my story and the mumbling got worse. It was as if she wasn't even paying attention to me at all. Finally, I stopped and pointed out to her that I had waited a long time for this appointment and it didn't feel like I was getting her attention. She said, ever so sweetly, "Oh no dear, I hear you." "Then what is it that are you so adamantly mumbling," I asked. I'll never forget her answer. She said, "Not a word of truth in it. Not a word of truth in it."
She refused to see me the way I was describing myself. She knew that my story was not who I was. She held firmly to the truth of who I was; to my highest potential, my higher self. She would not give credence to my circumstances. Because of that I was able to rise to the vision that she held for me. She saw me as far beyond my actual accomplishment at the time. What would the world be like If we could do that for others? A Course In Miracles calls it true charity. We are, in essence, enabling one another to live up to dreams that we hold for ourselves.
If you pay any attention, at all, to politics these days, you'll notice how much division there is between people drawn along party lines. There is such nasty, vengeful derisiveness that it borders on violence. And it is building to a feverish pitch. It is the other side of the spectrum to that which The Course advocates. It is looking at the worst in people; concentrating on their faults and it is all done for political gain (or television ratings) and very little of it involves the truth, but that doesn't matter. Say something long enough, about yourself or another, and you will begin to believe it. The power of words should never be underestimated. It is a game forged for gain and it does not serve anyone. It is so detrimental because it only serves to degrade the world that we all live in.
Politics, notwithstanding, most attack comes from our own projection of guilt. We bury things we've done in the past, that we are not proud of, and then seek to disown the guilt. Then we project it onto another person and feel justified in attacking them. That vicious cycle only exacerbates separation and personal despair.
When will we get it that we are all one? To quote Jesus again - not to put him in the spotlight too much but we just celebrated that resurrection thing and I figure he deserves it - "And whatsoever you do to the least of my brothers, you do to me." The law of cause and effect is as alive in our world as is the law of gravity. What goes around comes around. Quantum physics also weighs in heavily on this topic with string theory. We're all part of a cosmic field that unifies us.
The power we hold is undeniable and we can use it any way we choose. As Marianne Williamson says, "Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure.." And we are. If we are mindful of our actions we can create an unbelievable world for ourselves and others. The Talmud tells us that, "A light for one is a light for a hundred." We cannot forge good deeds for others without reaping benefit. We are all intrinsically connected.
This week I encourage you write down any guilt that you might be feeling. Guilt is the most destructive and useless emotion and it is usually a lie. Ask yourself the 4 questions that Byron Katie asks in The Work, starting with, "Is it true?" Set yourself free of the guilt that holds you back from seeing yourself and your brother as innocent, worthy, valuable and important. Practice unrelenting forgiveness for yourself so that you might see more clearly. Anyone or anything that bugs the shit of you is your key to areas in your own life that need attention and forgiveness.
THEN...
Practice seeing others living far beyond their actual accomplishments. See your best friend as the actress she wants to be; your husband thriving in the career that he loves; your sister being the mother that she longs to be. These thoughts become powerful waves of vibration that impact us and the people in our lives, much like prayer. We are all one and we must begin to act like it. Let's take the high road this week and begin to see each other as perfect. Let's hold each other in the highest esteem. I believe it will change the world.
I leave you this week with a quote from the Buddhist author and philosopher, Daisaku Ikeda who said, "Great people never forget what others have done for them."
When Jesus healed someone, it was because he saw that person as perfect. He held the perfection of the person in his consciousness. He did not see the disease, the problem or lack. In his presence, they were whole and then they would become that. This is why so many spiritual teachers do not want to hear our stories. They don't want to be dragged into our dysfunction or dis-ease. It is not the truth of who we are.
I was fortunate to know Ernest Holmes' Practitioner, Vetura Papke. She was my teacher and my Practitioner. The first time I made an appointment to see Vetura for spiritual guidance, she sat behind a desk in all her 80-some years of glory. She was as sweet looking as the kindest grandmother and she always smelled like flowers. As I began to lay out my woes, I noticed that she was mumbling something. I continued telling my story and the mumbling got worse. It was as if she wasn't even paying attention to me at all. Finally, I stopped and pointed out to her that I had waited a long time for this appointment and it didn't feel like I was getting her attention. She said, ever so sweetly, "Oh no dear, I hear you." "Then what is it that are you so adamantly mumbling," I asked. I'll never forget her answer. She said, "Not a word of truth in it. Not a word of truth in it."
She refused to see me the way I was describing myself. She knew that my story was not who I was. She held firmly to the truth of who I was; to my highest potential, my higher self. She would not give credence to my circumstances. Because of that I was able to rise to the vision that she held for me. She saw me as far beyond my actual accomplishment at the time. What would the world be like If we could do that for others? A Course In Miracles calls it true charity. We are, in essence, enabling one another to live up to dreams that we hold for ourselves.
If you pay any attention, at all, to politics these days, you'll notice how much division there is between people drawn along party lines. There is such nasty, vengeful derisiveness that it borders on violence. And it is building to a feverish pitch. It is the other side of the spectrum to that which The Course advocates. It is looking at the worst in people; concentrating on their faults and it is all done for political gain (or television ratings) and very little of it involves the truth, but that doesn't matter. Say something long enough, about yourself or another, and you will begin to believe it. The power of words should never be underestimated. It is a game forged for gain and it does not serve anyone. It is so detrimental because it only serves to degrade the world that we all live in.
Politics, notwithstanding, most attack comes from our own projection of guilt. We bury things we've done in the past, that we are not proud of, and then seek to disown the guilt. Then we project it onto another person and feel justified in attacking them. That vicious cycle only exacerbates separation and personal despair.
When will we get it that we are all one? To quote Jesus again - not to put him in the spotlight too much but we just celebrated that resurrection thing and I figure he deserves it - "And whatsoever you do to the least of my brothers, you do to me." The law of cause and effect is as alive in our world as is the law of gravity. What goes around comes around. Quantum physics also weighs in heavily on this topic with string theory. We're all part of a cosmic field that unifies us.
The power we hold is undeniable and we can use it any way we choose. As Marianne Williamson says, "Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure.." And we are. If we are mindful of our actions we can create an unbelievable world for ourselves and others. The Talmud tells us that, "A light for one is a light for a hundred." We cannot forge good deeds for others without reaping benefit. We are all intrinsically connected.
This week I encourage you write down any guilt that you might be feeling. Guilt is the most destructive and useless emotion and it is usually a lie. Ask yourself the 4 questions that Byron Katie asks in The Work, starting with, "Is it true?" Set yourself free of the guilt that holds you back from seeing yourself and your brother as innocent, worthy, valuable and important. Practice unrelenting forgiveness for yourself so that you might see more clearly. Anyone or anything that bugs the shit of you is your key to areas in your own life that need attention and forgiveness.
THEN...
Practice seeing others living far beyond their actual accomplishments. See your best friend as the actress she wants to be; your husband thriving in the career that he loves; your sister being the mother that she longs to be. These thoughts become powerful waves of vibration that impact us and the people in our lives, much like prayer. We are all one and we must begin to act like it. Let's take the high road this week and begin to see each other as perfect. Let's hold each other in the highest esteem. I believe it will change the world.
I leave you this week with a quote from the Buddhist author and philosopher, Daisaku Ikeda who said, "Great people never forget what others have done for them."
Tuesday, February 23, 2010
Powerfully Remembering
I've been thinking a lot lately about something Dr. Robert Holden, Director of the Happiness Project said about control. He said, "Shift happens – when you let go!" Too much control can cramp creativity, cause power struggles, block flow and upset relationships." Now, I don't know about you but this new year seems to be seriously kicking butt. It's requiring an unparalleled vigilance to let go! - Letting go of thoughts that no longer serve us, letting go of pain from the past, letting go of grievances toward ourselves and others and letting go of our limiting thoughts. It's as if the universe is conspiring for our good in an unrelenting manner. Ready or not, here we go.
We have been asking and make no mistake, we are getting answers. Unfortunately, sometimes we don't like the answers that we get. Can we be happy and fulfilled without having to change? Apparently not. It was Einstein who said, “You can never solve a problem on the level on which it was created.” In other words, if we seek to solve our problems from the level of the brain and logic, relying on the same source from which we created them, we only perpetuate what I call faulty problem solving. We must no longer funnel our actions through the pain of our past. It will always color our results and give us more of the same. In this year, like no other, we are being asked to give up our limiting thoughts and beliefs in order to create the lives that we seek. The past does not have to equal the future and yet we rely on the past to give us the vision of tomorrow. That's all about to change. We live in a time of unparalleled opportunity.
It is time to reach beyond our pain and our history and our fears, step out of those thoughts that continue to create unwanted circumstances and let go with a vengeance. I believe that 2010 is giving us more opportunity to let go. I am feeling it stronger than ever and I believe it's because we've been asking, universally and individually, stronger than ever. As we continue to ask, pray and request change, the pressure becomes greater in our lives to make those internal changes that are holding us back.
As the great thinkers know anything we seek must begin within us. Nothing is outside of ourselves. As Gandhi put it, "We must become the change that we want to see." And Daisaku Ikeda, Buddhist leader and philosopher says,"A great revolution in just a single individual will help achieve a change in the destiny of a nation, and further, will enable a change in the destiny of humankind." We are powerful beyond measure - not only to create the dreams in our own lives, but to change the world. I believe we've come to the limit of tolerance for settling. No longer can we live the small lives that our limiting beliefs have created. We've put out the strong edict...ENOUGH.
I don't know about you, but I have a tendency to postpone my good while I'm working hard for it. Sounds silly, I know. I forgot to trust the process and I took back the reigns of control believing more in what I could make happen through virtue of hard work. I got so caught up in the work that I kept creating more work. Remember, what we focus on gets bigger. I forgot to let go and trust my higher good. I forgot to have faith in a mystic law that creates unfathomable good in our lives. I forgot.
I thought I could make it all happen and force my dreams into place. Then I remembered that my job is to be responsible for myself on a deeply committed level and let the effect of those causes play out naturally in my environment. I do not have to run around fixing everything in my world; I must be more concerned with tuning in to a heart and a mind whose intentions are creating my world. I must quickly dismiss any thought that relies on past circumstances telling me that 'I can't do this or that,' 'that will never work,' 'that doesn't make sense.' I must reach for the higher thought, the truth that speaks quietly behind those doubts - that voice of my higher self that reminds me of Jesus' words when he said, "...and greater works than these shall you do..."
We have been asking and make no mistake, we are getting answers. Unfortunately, sometimes we don't like the answers that we get. Can we be happy and fulfilled without having to change? Apparently not. It was Einstein who said, “You can never solve a problem on the level on which it was created.” In other words, if we seek to solve our problems from the level of the brain and logic, relying on the same source from which we created them, we only perpetuate what I call faulty problem solving. We must no longer funnel our actions through the pain of our past. It will always color our results and give us more of the same. In this year, like no other, we are being asked to give up our limiting thoughts and beliefs in order to create the lives that we seek. The past does not have to equal the future and yet we rely on the past to give us the vision of tomorrow. That's all about to change. We live in a time of unparalleled opportunity.
It is time to reach beyond our pain and our history and our fears, step out of those thoughts that continue to create unwanted circumstances and let go with a vengeance. I believe that 2010 is giving us more opportunity to let go. I am feeling it stronger than ever and I believe it's because we've been asking, universally and individually, stronger than ever. As we continue to ask, pray and request change, the pressure becomes greater in our lives to make those internal changes that are holding us back.
As the great thinkers know anything we seek must begin within us. Nothing is outside of ourselves. As Gandhi put it, "We must become the change that we want to see." And Daisaku Ikeda, Buddhist leader and philosopher says,"A great revolution in just a single individual will help achieve a change in the destiny of a nation, and further, will enable a change in the destiny of humankind." We are powerful beyond measure - not only to create the dreams in our own lives, but to change the world. I believe we've come to the limit of tolerance for settling. No longer can we live the small lives that our limiting beliefs have created. We've put out the strong edict...ENOUGH.
I don't know about you, but I have a tendency to postpone my good while I'm working hard for it. Sounds silly, I know. I forgot to trust the process and I took back the reigns of control believing more in what I could make happen through virtue of hard work. I got so caught up in the work that I kept creating more work. Remember, what we focus on gets bigger. I forgot to let go and trust my higher good. I forgot to have faith in a mystic law that creates unfathomable good in our lives. I forgot.
I thought I could make it all happen and force my dreams into place. Then I remembered that my job is to be responsible for myself on a deeply committed level and let the effect of those causes play out naturally in my environment. I do not have to run around fixing everything in my world; I must be more concerned with tuning in to a heart and a mind whose intentions are creating my world. I must quickly dismiss any thought that relies on past circumstances telling me that 'I can't do this or that,' 'that will never work,' 'that doesn't make sense.' I must reach for the higher thought, the truth that speaks quietly behind those doubts - that voice of my higher self that reminds me of Jesus' words when he said, "...and greater works than these shall you do..."
Let's not let the thoughts of worry, about a future that isn't even real and might never come, invade our minds. Let's be vigilant and let go of the past and residual voices that hold us back. We must unequivocally take a stand and say - sorry, but you're not welcome here any more. As Esther Hicks, teacher of the Abraham material, says to those pesky voices, "Thank you for sharing now go to your room." Let's refuse them anymore entry into our lives and our world. Let's take powerful responsibility for our lives and change them in a manner that "will enable a change in the destiny of humankind." Let's enable the good and let go of control that fosters old, unwanted behavior.
If you need to know which areas of your life need adjustment, listen to your own words. As you offer advice to another listen carefully to the wisdom and guidance you are giving, because it remains true that we teach best what we need to learn.
2010 is leaning on us hard to give us what we've been asking for. This is the year. It is rife with opportunity and relentless in its request for us to let go. What is called for here is diligent attention to returning to the truth of who we are and trusting the relationship between our higher selves and our universe to deliver our hearts desire. I'm committed. Who's with me?
I leave you with a wonderful quote from John F Kennedy who said, "...Let us not seek to fix the blame for the past. Let us accept our own responsibility for the future."
Saturday, January 16, 2010
Faith or Fear?
I've been thinking a lot lately about the adage, "the past does not equal the future." Unfortunately, for most of us it does. As Ernest Holmes used to say, "We create with monotonous regularity the patterns of our past." It's 2010! Aren't you ready to break free of those patterns that keep recreating situations that you no longer want? I sure am!
When we rely on our past to guide us through our future, consciously or unconsciously, we are asking for the same outcome. When we create our future based on the pain of our past it does not result in happiness. Caroline Myss, author and teacher, tells us that "True healing requires that we find a route beyond our pain so it does not control us or cause us to want to punish or control others."
So what do we do? Our past does not go away. It's part of who we are. And make no mistake, it has made us into the wonderful human beings that we are today. But when there is unresolved pain or fear attached to our past it has a way of impacting our future. It also begins to create disease in our bodies as a result of the dis-ease in our minds. If you find problems in your relationships, career, family and health that continue to surface, chances are that they are signs of an unresolved past. This is good because this is the way we are directed to the root of our problems, our pain and our unhappiness. We can no longer blame anything or anyone outside of ourselves. There is a common denominator in every problem you have...you!
This is the good news. It means we have the power to change it. This is inner transformation. This will change our destiny because we are not doing the same thing and expecting different results - which, I believe, is the definition of insanity. Caroline goes on to say that, "this type of inner work demands we defeat our reasoning minds and enlist deeper resources within ourselves, namely the power of our souls. And getting in touch with that power is, without a doubt, an act of grace generously given to those who ask." I believe we are all asking. And when we do, answers reveal themselves in unexpected ways.
When you feel fear or discomfort as you proceed in a new direction in your life, you can be sure that it is linked to a painful past - it's hitting on a memory like cold water hits on a cavity. This is your sign. Your negative emotions are the best indicator of what's amiss. From this place there are so many things you can do to release its grip. You can do Byron Katie's, The Work; move up the emotional scale with the aid of tools from Abraham. You can pray and invoke your spiritual guides; or chant a strong and powerful Buddhist chant and then move forward with that new determination. You may simply need to forgive yourself or another by writing about it. It usually has nothing to do with another person. Healing happens at the level of the heart. Sometimes, simply becoming aware of something is all that is needed. It discharges the energy it has to miscreate in your life. We are constantly being directed toward our good and there is help, seen and unseen, all along the way. I recently reminded myself, by way of a friend's inquisition, that "If you knew Who walks beside you on the way that you have chosen, fear would be impossible." – A Course in Miracles
We are demanding that 2010 be the year that delivers the good that we've been holding at bay. We will no longer subscribe to the fear of our limiting beliefs. We must begin to act from faith not fear. Faith, that we are being guided to our most perfect grace; not F.E.A.R - false evidence appearing real. When we poke at that fear, it's reality will disappear and the evidence of it in our lives will be gone.
I have been addressing money concerns differently this year and already getting markedly different results. I am consciously choosing not to think with the mind and memories of my past on the subject. I choose instead to think with the power of my soul and invoke all the help that I know surrounds me. If fear comes up, I lean heavily upon my faith and know with a strong inner knowing that all is well and getting better by the moment. My next step will be one of confidence knowing that I am boldly being directed to my good. I choose faith over fear because I have taken responsibility for my past and everything that happens in my life - I can't even blame the economy for it - that would leave me powerless and impotent to affect my future.
My friend, Jack Canfield of Chicken Soup fame, puts it well when he says, "...fear is self created by focusing on something in the future that hasn't happened yet." And we base that fear on our past. Let's stop perpetuating and creating fear. Let's bless our past for all that it continues to teach us and move boldly into 2010, confident that we are creating the lives we desire.
I leave you this week with a quote from Thoreau, who said it best! "Go confidently in the direction of your dreams. Live the life you've imagined."
When we rely on our past to guide us through our future, consciously or unconsciously, we are asking for the same outcome. When we create our future based on the pain of our past it does not result in happiness. Caroline Myss, author and teacher, tells us that "True healing requires that we find a route beyond our pain so it does not control us or cause us to want to punish or control others."
So what do we do? Our past does not go away. It's part of who we are. And make no mistake, it has made us into the wonderful human beings that we are today. But when there is unresolved pain or fear attached to our past it has a way of impacting our future. It also begins to create disease in our bodies as a result of the dis-ease in our minds. If you find problems in your relationships, career, family and health that continue to surface, chances are that they are signs of an unresolved past. This is good because this is the way we are directed to the root of our problems, our pain and our unhappiness. We can no longer blame anything or anyone outside of ourselves. There is a common denominator in every problem you have...you!
This is the good news. It means we have the power to change it. This is inner transformation. This will change our destiny because we are not doing the same thing and expecting different results - which, I believe, is the definition of insanity. Caroline goes on to say that, "this type of inner work demands we defeat our reasoning minds and enlist deeper resources within ourselves, namely the power of our souls. And getting in touch with that power is, without a doubt, an act of grace generously given to those who ask." I believe we are all asking. And when we do, answers reveal themselves in unexpected ways.
When you feel fear or discomfort as you proceed in a new direction in your life, you can be sure that it is linked to a painful past - it's hitting on a memory like cold water hits on a cavity. This is your sign. Your negative emotions are the best indicator of what's amiss. From this place there are so many things you can do to release its grip. You can do Byron Katie's, The Work; move up the emotional scale with the aid of tools from Abraham. You can pray and invoke your spiritual guides; or chant a strong and powerful Buddhist chant and then move forward with that new determination. You may simply need to forgive yourself or another by writing about it. It usually has nothing to do with another person. Healing happens at the level of the heart. Sometimes, simply becoming aware of something is all that is needed. It discharges the energy it has to miscreate in your life. We are constantly being directed toward our good and there is help, seen and unseen, all along the way. I recently reminded myself, by way of a friend's inquisition, that "If you knew Who walks beside you on the way that you have chosen, fear would be impossible." – A Course in Miracles
We are demanding that 2010 be the year that delivers the good that we've been holding at bay. We will no longer subscribe to the fear of our limiting beliefs. We must begin to act from faith not fear. Faith, that we are being guided to our most perfect grace; not F.E.A.R - false evidence appearing real. When we poke at that fear, it's reality will disappear and the evidence of it in our lives will be gone.
I have been addressing money concerns differently this year and already getting markedly different results. I am consciously choosing not to think with the mind and memories of my past on the subject. I choose instead to think with the power of my soul and invoke all the help that I know surrounds me. If fear comes up, I lean heavily upon my faith and know with a strong inner knowing that all is well and getting better by the moment. My next step will be one of confidence knowing that I am boldly being directed to my good. I choose faith over fear because I have taken responsibility for my past and everything that happens in my life - I can't even blame the economy for it - that would leave me powerless and impotent to affect my future.
My friend, Jack Canfield of Chicken Soup fame, puts it well when he says, "...fear is self created by focusing on something in the future that hasn't happened yet." And we base that fear on our past. Let's stop perpetuating and creating fear. Let's bless our past for all that it continues to teach us and move boldly into 2010, confident that we are creating the lives we desire.
I leave you this week with a quote from Thoreau, who said it best! "Go confidently in the direction of your dreams. Live the life you've imagined."
Tuesday, December 29, 2009
Happiness Realized
I've been thinking a lot lately about happiness and why it's so important. In fact it's the most important thing we can do in life. But so many reasons, habits and "shoulds" have blocked us from pursuing our own happiness.
We've been told that it's a selfish endeavor and we should think of others first. Having an Italian, Catholic background this not only sounded right to me, but it felt right. It was genetically accurate as far as I was concerned. Being a martyr was the calling of my DNA as I watched my grandmother sweat in the kitchen, suffer for her family and say with regularity, "you'll be sorry when I'm gone." It's no wonder her last name was Martorella! I kid you not. Clearly, I was born to suffer for the good of others - but without donning the black veil. That would be a bit over the top. But without question, coming from the Puritanical path that built this Country and being indoctrinated in the great American work ethic, we've been taught that we must work hard for the good of others. But when we forget ourselves in the process, being the good Christian, Jew, Catholic or what have you, we become like the starving man trying to feed others.
I think I talked before about what my wish for the world would be, if I were given one wish - and it couldn't be to have an infinite number of wishes. (I thought I had that one figured out as a kid.) But if I truly had only one wish, it would be that everyone would constantly feel like they were in love. Think about how wonderful the world looked from that perspective; how kind and compassionate you were to everyone because it naturally came from your joy. I seriously doubt that hunger, war or hatred could survive if the dominant emotion on this planet was love. It wasn't until I was older that I realized that that feeling is the feeling of true happiness that we were born to have.
Since it's true that there is no one out there but ourselves and that we are the playwright of our own reality, then our own happiness is a significant barometer in what we create. Psychologists call it projection. We simply project our internal awareness, whether good or bad, onto people and onto the world and thus create our lives. It is no surprise that our thoughts create. What we think and what we believe becomes our lives. However, more potent still are the feelings that drive those thoughts. When beliefs, which are just thoughts we keep on thinking, are fueled by strong emotion, our power of creation is exponentially packed. When there is anger and hatred behind a belief, our world is full of judgment, bigotry and war. When happiness and joy feed our beliefs, our lives and the world become a very different place. The book, Ask and It Is Given, by my good friends Esther and Jerry Hicks, gives great insight to how powerfully our emotions attract circumstances into our lives. (The link is in "My Library.")
There is no doubt that we create our world, and if happiness is cultivated, it becomes the back-drop of our creation. It is the most important thing we can do for our lives and for this world. It is our own internal joy that will propel vast goodwill, which will foster the healing of pain. The beauty of this happiness and joy is that is exists inside ourselves. We look for it in so many other places first - our education, career, family, financial standing - when in fact it resides within us and has all along. It will never be found outside of ourselves, even if we attain everything that we "think" will make us happy. It brings to mind something Terry Cole-Whittaker, author of What You Think of Me is None of My Business, among other books, would say. "The thing you're waiting to have happen before you make the commitment happens after you make the commitment." In other words, a commitment to yourself is necessary in order to realize your desires. It's opposite of how the world has taught us. Go to the good school, get the grades, the job, the family and then you will be happy and successful. We all know people with all these things who are fundamentally unhappy wondering, "Is this all there is?"
When you are happy, irrespective of external circumstances, life is sweet and you feel good. This vibration that causes good things to come our way. They are the feelings that foster our desire to help one another, to be kind to one another. Contrast that against trying to help others when we ourselves are unhappy. It only causes more unhappiness.
No matter how much we might think otherwise, we are all one. You cannot do something to another person without doing it to yourself. Spiritually we are told that we are all part of the same source - God, love, the universe - by whatever name you call it. Quantum physicists tell us that we are all connected by an intelligent field. We affect ourselves by our actions to another. That is why, as my Science of Mind teachers used to tell me, "You cannot out give God." When you are happy and do something kind to another, you feel great. The better you feel the more you raise your vibration, the higher your vibration, the more attractive it is to the things you desire. It is good followed by more good - you cannot out give God. Christians call it the Golden Rule - do unto others as you would have them do unto you. Buddhists call it Cause and Effect - what you do comes back to you.
So, what is it that stands in the way of us being happy? Our past? Our beliefs about ourselves? Our judgments about ourselves as we compare ourselves to the rest of the world? All of it, I believe, which is why we must begin with our own thoughts and feelings. In this coming new year, try to look at yourself through the eyes of that "being in love" place. We would never treat a person who we were in love with the way we treat ourselves. Begin to focus on the perfection of who you are - we are innocent and we are love. Daisaku Ikeda, Buddhist philosopher and author, tells us that, "There is an expansive life-state of profound, secure happiness that transcends any material or social advantage. It is called faith, it is called the life-state of Buddhahood."
As you stand-up for the truth of who you are, things unlike it may surface. Be quick to forgive yourself or another realizing that everything happens for a reason. Mostly, that reason is to learn compassion and to uncover the truth about ourselves and others. A Course In Miracles says that, "The miracle does nothing. All it does is to undo. And thus it cancels out the interference to what has been done. It does not add, but merely takes away." Let the miracle in your life be the undoing of all that has covered your innate happiness. When you do, your joy will automatically rise to the top like a cork that was being held under water. It naturally wants to spring to the surface and when you let go, it will. When you pop that cork on New Year's think of all the joy and happiness that will naturally come forth out of your very being. Begin to feel the joy and happiness in your life and it will expand. War will never end with weapons. It will only cease when we find the place of peace and joy within our own lives and then extend it to another. Let's bombard one another with the kindness in 2010 - that kindness that will naturally be born from our happiness. It's easy to be joyful when happiness is your dominant vibration. Let's lead with joy in 2010 and see how profoundly we'll change the world simply by becoming happy.
I leave you this week with another gift from my friend, Jacob. It's his New Year's Booklet and I highly recommend it. It will set you on the right track for 2010.
I also leave you with a quote from Helen Keller who encouraged us to keep our thoughts high when she said, "No pessimist ever discouvered the secrets of the stars, or sailed to an uncharted land, or opened a new doorway for the human spirit."
We've been told that it's a selfish endeavor and we should think of others first. Having an Italian, Catholic background this not only sounded right to me, but it felt right. It was genetically accurate as far as I was concerned. Being a martyr was the calling of my DNA as I watched my grandmother sweat in the kitchen, suffer for her family and say with regularity, "you'll be sorry when I'm gone." It's no wonder her last name was Martorella! I kid you not. Clearly, I was born to suffer for the good of others - but without donning the black veil. That would be a bit over the top. But without question, coming from the Puritanical path that built this Country and being indoctrinated in the great American work ethic, we've been taught that we must work hard for the good of others. But when we forget ourselves in the process, being the good Christian, Jew, Catholic or what have you, we become like the starving man trying to feed others.
I think I talked before about what my wish for the world would be, if I were given one wish - and it couldn't be to have an infinite number of wishes. (I thought I had that one figured out as a kid.) But if I truly had only one wish, it would be that everyone would constantly feel like they were in love. Think about how wonderful the world looked from that perspective; how kind and compassionate you were to everyone because it naturally came from your joy. I seriously doubt that hunger, war or hatred could survive if the dominant emotion on this planet was love. It wasn't until I was older that I realized that that feeling is the feeling of true happiness that we were born to have.
Since it's true that there is no one out there but ourselves and that we are the playwright of our own reality, then our own happiness is a significant barometer in what we create. Psychologists call it projection. We simply project our internal awareness, whether good or bad, onto people and onto the world and thus create our lives. It is no surprise that our thoughts create. What we think and what we believe becomes our lives. However, more potent still are the feelings that drive those thoughts. When beliefs, which are just thoughts we keep on thinking, are fueled by strong emotion, our power of creation is exponentially packed. When there is anger and hatred behind a belief, our world is full of judgment, bigotry and war. When happiness and joy feed our beliefs, our lives and the world become a very different place. The book, Ask and It Is Given, by my good friends Esther and Jerry Hicks, gives great insight to how powerfully our emotions attract circumstances into our lives. (The link is in "My Library.")
There is no doubt that we create our world, and if happiness is cultivated, it becomes the back-drop of our creation. It is the most important thing we can do for our lives and for this world. It is our own internal joy that will propel vast goodwill, which will foster the healing of pain. The beauty of this happiness and joy is that is exists inside ourselves. We look for it in so many other places first - our education, career, family, financial standing - when in fact it resides within us and has all along. It will never be found outside of ourselves, even if we attain everything that we "think" will make us happy. It brings to mind something Terry Cole-Whittaker, author of What You Think of Me is None of My Business, among other books, would say. "The thing you're waiting to have happen before you make the commitment happens after you make the commitment." In other words, a commitment to yourself is necessary in order to realize your desires. It's opposite of how the world has taught us. Go to the good school, get the grades, the job, the family and then you will be happy and successful. We all know people with all these things who are fundamentally unhappy wondering, "Is this all there is?"
When you are happy, irrespective of external circumstances, life is sweet and you feel good. This vibration that causes good things to come our way. They are the feelings that foster our desire to help one another, to be kind to one another. Contrast that against trying to help others when we ourselves are unhappy. It only causes more unhappiness.
No matter how much we might think otherwise, we are all one. You cannot do something to another person without doing it to yourself. Spiritually we are told that we are all part of the same source - God, love, the universe - by whatever name you call it. Quantum physicists tell us that we are all connected by an intelligent field. We affect ourselves by our actions to another. That is why, as my Science of Mind teachers used to tell me, "You cannot out give God." When you are happy and do something kind to another, you feel great. The better you feel the more you raise your vibration, the higher your vibration, the more attractive it is to the things you desire. It is good followed by more good - you cannot out give God. Christians call it the Golden Rule - do unto others as you would have them do unto you. Buddhists call it Cause and Effect - what you do comes back to you.
So, what is it that stands in the way of us being happy? Our past? Our beliefs about ourselves? Our judgments about ourselves as we compare ourselves to the rest of the world? All of it, I believe, which is why we must begin with our own thoughts and feelings. In this coming new year, try to look at yourself through the eyes of that "being in love" place. We would never treat a person who we were in love with the way we treat ourselves. Begin to focus on the perfection of who you are - we are innocent and we are love. Daisaku Ikeda, Buddhist philosopher and author, tells us that, "There is an expansive life-state of profound, secure happiness that transcends any material or social advantage. It is called faith, it is called the life-state of Buddhahood."
As you stand-up for the truth of who you are, things unlike it may surface. Be quick to forgive yourself or another realizing that everything happens for a reason. Mostly, that reason is to learn compassion and to uncover the truth about ourselves and others. A Course In Miracles says that, "The miracle does nothing. All it does is to undo. And thus it cancels out the interference to what has been done. It does not add, but merely takes away." Let the miracle in your life be the undoing of all that has covered your innate happiness. When you do, your joy will automatically rise to the top like a cork that was being held under water. It naturally wants to spring to the surface and when you let go, it will. When you pop that cork on New Year's think of all the joy and happiness that will naturally come forth out of your very being. Begin to feel the joy and happiness in your life and it will expand. War will never end with weapons. It will only cease when we find the place of peace and joy within our own lives and then extend it to another. Let's bombard one another with the kindness in 2010 - that kindness that will naturally be born from our happiness. It's easy to be joyful when happiness is your dominant vibration. Let's lead with joy in 2010 and see how profoundly we'll change the world simply by becoming happy.
I leave you this week with another gift from my friend, Jacob. It's his New Year's Booklet and I highly recommend it. It will set you on the right track for 2010.
I also leave you with a quote from Helen Keller who encouraged us to keep our thoughts high when she said, "No pessimist ever discouvered the secrets of the stars, or sailed to an uncharted land, or opened a new doorway for the human spirit."
Tuesday, November 24, 2009
Simply Wonderful
I've been thinking a lot lately about a very deep and very wise admonition A Course In Miracles gives to "Avoid the temptation to perceive yourself as unfairly treated."
This is a big one for me because given the opportunity, I could easily dwell in feeling sorry for myself. But the minute I do, I have just set into motion opportunities for circumstances to enter my life that help me feel like a victim. I've opened the door for those types of possibilities to be let in. Remember, we create what we focus on, wanted or unwanted. We live in a compliant universe. It always agrees with what we think and gives us more of that - I'm stupid. Yes you are. I'm happy. Yes you are. I'm rich, pretty, successful, attractive; whatever it may be the universe is quick to provide agreement and give of us evidence that our thoughts are right.
It is increasingly easy in today's world to perceive ourselves as unfairly treated, as victims of circumstances, when things like the economy seem to upset our apple cart. It becomes easy to point to a specific person or thing and deem them responsible for our unhappiness. It is clearly outside of ourselves, right? When we perceive the world this way we slide into the vicious cycle of blame, anger and separation. It keeps the position of victim strong and we all know what that attracts - more circumstances that allow us to feel sorry for ourselves. That is not a happy life. None of it serves our lives. We are first cause of everything - plain and simple.
No one seems to be going through these times unscathed. People everywhere are being pressured to let go of patterns and give up thoughts that have not served them. Like the rock that endures tremendous heat and pressure, we are given the opportunity to become diamonds. But it requires us to let go of the patterns of our past. We must wake up and become conscious of the thoughts we keep on thinking that keep sustaining the life that we keep on getting. Dr. Ernest Holmes said it best, "We create with monotonous regularity the patterns of our past." ...Until we seek to change our minds.
Along with these difficult times we are being given tremendous opportunity for change. Old ways of being are dying and giving birth to new beginnings. We are being asked to give up patterns and thoughts that have held us back so we can have everything we've ever dreamed of. It easy for us to be convinced that things are bad. It's time to make the switch and be convinced of how good things can be. As Marianne Williamson would say, "Ask for what wonderful looks like." Let's not hold on to being "sufferers" who perceive ourselves as unfairly treated. Let's take responsibility for what we create in our lives so that we can create anew.
How best do we begin to shed this old skin? Awareness is the first step. Once you become conscious of your patterns you automatically begin to diffuse them. Also, there is nothing more potent or positively attractive than gratitude and appreciation. It is fitting in this time we set aside for Thanksgiving that I ask you to become an avid appreciator. Begin to notice everything that is good in your life and everything that is going right. There is so much. Instead of looking in the mirror and seeing flaws, notice the perfection there is to behold. When I would look at a photograph of myself that I didn't like, my wise Italian mother would say to me, "You're going to love it in 10 years!" She was right. But let's not wait. Let's love and appreciate ourselves now and be grateful for the wonderful lives we have been given. Remember, we get what we focus on, whether wanted or unwanted. Let's focus on wonderful this week.
Finally, take a look at my friend Jacob's Daily Pages post. His 30 day suggestion is exactly what's called for here. I strongly suggest you try it for the next 30 days - I am going to. Let's take this journey together and watch wonderful unfold in ways we've never dreamed of.
I leave you this week, with a quote from Meister Eckhart who said, "If the only prayer you say in your life is thank you, that would be enough.”
This is a big one for me because given the opportunity, I could easily dwell in feeling sorry for myself. But the minute I do, I have just set into motion opportunities for circumstances to enter my life that help me feel like a victim. I've opened the door for those types of possibilities to be let in. Remember, we create what we focus on, wanted or unwanted. We live in a compliant universe. It always agrees with what we think and gives us more of that - I'm stupid. Yes you are. I'm happy. Yes you are. I'm rich, pretty, successful, attractive; whatever it may be the universe is quick to provide agreement and give of us evidence that our thoughts are right.
It is increasingly easy in today's world to perceive ourselves as unfairly treated, as victims of circumstances, when things like the economy seem to upset our apple cart. It becomes easy to point to a specific person or thing and deem them responsible for our unhappiness. It is clearly outside of ourselves, right? When we perceive the world this way we slide into the vicious cycle of blame, anger and separation. It keeps the position of victim strong and we all know what that attracts - more circumstances that allow us to feel sorry for ourselves. That is not a happy life. None of it serves our lives. We are first cause of everything - plain and simple.
No one seems to be going through these times unscathed. People everywhere are being pressured to let go of patterns and give up thoughts that have not served them. Like the rock that endures tremendous heat and pressure, we are given the opportunity to become diamonds. But it requires us to let go of the patterns of our past. We must wake up and become conscious of the thoughts we keep on thinking that keep sustaining the life that we keep on getting. Dr. Ernest Holmes said it best, "We create with monotonous regularity the patterns of our past." ...Until we seek to change our minds.
Along with these difficult times we are being given tremendous opportunity for change. Old ways of being are dying and giving birth to new beginnings. We are being asked to give up patterns and thoughts that have held us back so we can have everything we've ever dreamed of. It easy for us to be convinced that things are bad. It's time to make the switch and be convinced of how good things can be. As Marianne Williamson would say, "Ask for what wonderful looks like." Let's not hold on to being "sufferers" who perceive ourselves as unfairly treated. Let's take responsibility for what we create in our lives so that we can create anew.
How best do we begin to shed this old skin? Awareness is the first step. Once you become conscious of your patterns you automatically begin to diffuse them. Also, there is nothing more potent or positively attractive than gratitude and appreciation. It is fitting in this time we set aside for Thanksgiving that I ask you to become an avid appreciator. Begin to notice everything that is good in your life and everything that is going right. There is so much. Instead of looking in the mirror and seeing flaws, notice the perfection there is to behold. When I would look at a photograph of myself that I didn't like, my wise Italian mother would say to me, "You're going to love it in 10 years!" She was right. But let's not wait. Let's love and appreciate ourselves now and be grateful for the wonderful lives we have been given. Remember, we get what we focus on, whether wanted or unwanted. Let's focus on wonderful this week.
Finally, take a look at my friend Jacob's Daily Pages post. His 30 day suggestion is exactly what's called for here. I strongly suggest you try it for the next 30 days - I am going to. Let's take this journey together and watch wonderful unfold in ways we've never dreamed of.
I leave you this week, with a quote from Meister Eckhart who said, "If the only prayer you say in your life is thank you, that would be enough.”
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